*The future awaits us~*

Thursday, July 31, 2008

i'm tired, i'm tired.
oh and my finger hurts.

luckily this week does not have cca. not in any mood to go anyway. tests and more tests, competition and more competitions.

few down, more to go.
it is endless and i mean it.

next monday it is the worst, i'm not going to be free this weekend. mass chionging of for the tests starts tomorrow since i got no cca.
monday=4 tests!!!
english writing, chinese(tingxie but still considered test), ehist test, emaths test. @_@ to hell with it. english, chinese and emaths should not be much of a problem. ehist is the hardest of them all... it just seems so tough.
all i can say is i need quite a lot of time to prepare.

today was disasterous.
australian maths competition was crap. stare blankly and make loads of careless mistakes. that happens when you have no calculators. i was totally screwed and the teacher didnt give extra time to let us shade our names. wth? my name is considered 16 characters long including the spaces. with my brain not thinking straight, i was quite blur about what i was writing. tikam lor, no hopes le.

then i wanted to ask about what i can do for the stencils part. they were not ready so i could not get my work yet. getting it tomorrow where i will have to rush everything by next friday, the actual competition date.

i knew there was something suspicious about the notice we were given about CIP that we were suppose to prepare HALAL refreshments. so i was right.
i just entered the place, dunno what i have to do and i got thrown into doing what was originally not my job.
tea making was quite retarded. hot water not hot. people getting sequence all wrong. tea turns cold almost instantly. i was felt it was quite hopeless. the old folks complained it was too cold inside... hmmm, the egg tarts were a little sweet and the folks were forcing us to finish the tarts.
we are rather misleaded by what the old folks do. apparently none of them play chinese chess o_O and only some know mahjong. what about folding paper? it was more of a failure.

i'm half suspecting that the old folks were not very satisfied with the activities we had. i still think that talking to them is already a joy to them. but it doesnt matter anymore. besides, there was a terrible generation gap, and a language barrier.

haix, officially broke~ zzz... stupid school keep making people pay for edulearn/heymaths when we are already way into the year. i rarely even use them and they are not helpful either. that is $23.70 spent. and i thought we had already paid in the beginning of the year.

sian de la...

<|6:27 PM|>

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

i'm starting to look slack, irresponsible and not cooperative.

why am i like the last to be informed? or why am i not informed in the first place?
am i suppose to be blamed for not finding out myself?
ok maybe i'm not the last, at some cases the information is not well spread.
and when i figured out what was going on, it is like the end of the situation?

in my eyes(mind), i'm starting to see the 1-2HM scenario happening again. they get to make the decisions for the class. they plan everything. they keep the good stuffs to themselves. they expect everyone to follow. they... they... they...

oh certainly i'm sounding jealous or something.

friends, i'm starting to doubt are the real friends.
the ones that are really willing to spend time to understand you.
not the ones who make a sweeping statement out of you. if you never ask, how do you know if i dont want? how do you know i dont know? taking everything for granted.

i'm just very sensitive to these things. i really dont want to, it is just a part of me.

haix, my efforts are useless.

and i know, if i start trying to find fault in people, someone will shoot back that i should find fault in myself.
equal and opposite reactions.

then again, i should try to spend more time understanding myself. i'm feeling a bit schizophrenic. sometimes i do things without realising, until i suddenly awake from that subconsious state.

it can get quite irritating when the teacher knocks on you table telling you to turn to xxx page when you are already at it. hey, i just had my hand on that page but i could still see what we were told to look at. -_-" retarded or retarded?

<|5:25 PM|>

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

the atmosphere was tense today. but occasionally i was laughing and laughing until my stomach hurt.
suay suay suay...

we had pft 5 items today. my performance for certain items was disappointing. merely managed to get C and above for all of it. hmmm... with a little help here and there.

we went shuttle run first, where i was rather distracted because...
worst part of the shuttle run was on the first run, i nearly missed the line to put the bean bag down. it was faded and many could not see it anyway. mat was a bit slippery and i was sliding a little when turning. broke my straight records of 11.6 seconds each time. not for the better, but for the worse.

sit ups were next, i felt horrible. stomach a bit pain and i really mean stomach ok. needed a bit of help here and there =\

sit and reach!!!!! omg i felt so excited for it. for some reason it has became my best item and i barely needed any effort for it. i didnt even try for the second time. haha people say i should join dance or something since i was so flexible... techniques used is always important-- straighten back and pivot from the hip there, distance covered even more. haha the other one most should know =)

standing broad jump used to be my best and i could get an A every year. but now... NO A!!! i'm so depressed about it(ya right) and i dont know how i jumped a rather silent one that was not even my best. it doesnt really matter though. but i actually wanted to try to jump without my shoes...

inclined pull ups was weird. when i did, i could here people talking about how i made it seem so easy because i dunno what bowling ball dunno what. jacquelyn did 30!!! and she got so excited and ran around. that was better than some boys actually... jyening ar, scared cannot even do 10, end up do 20++++... but some who looked like they could do very well, didnt do very well.

i overestimated a few people. and underestimated some? i was really surprised...

results for the end of all the 6 items for pft:
sit ups- 28 (C)
standing broad jump- 170cm (C)
sit and reach- 59cm (A)
inclined pull up- 17 (A)
shuttle run- 11.8sec (C)
2.4 run- 18.10mins (E)
total- 20points bronze.
haha, if by any hope i can finish my 2.4 by 16.10 mins, i will get a gold!
this year i broke my sit and reach record, and my lowest total point record... NO B THIS YEAR! oh dang, what crap is that?

there is still some hope?
but it will still be a never say die part in the 2.4 run. haha, as usual i will join the rerun every single time. ^^

<|5:48 PM|>

Monday, July 28, 2008

i felt dissociated from the class again.

a turn and the friends disappeared...

after wasting 2 hours just to revamp the class blog yesterday, some person is still not satisfied. diligence loves black and white(notice board colour) hence grey was a suitable colour for the background of the class blog.

for some weird reason, there was this awkward atmosphere on the bus this morning. felt like talking but it just could not start. it just happens every time because... =x

for some weird reason, i cant remember what happened during lessons today.
one thing i remembered was about how i was trying to stop liyan from lying her head on my pencil case that i actually poked my pen into my finger. then my finger was bleeding... -_-"

my composition grades are improving bit by bit. very little grammatical errors, just spelling errors due to fast writing. like how i spelt the ferocious beast as ferocious best... maybe blogging like this does help a little. i really mean a little. it was not much of a swing in grades from mr lee's marking and ms yee's marking. but i'll still be working harder for english! cheers~

i'm telling the world that yijue went into the girls toilet, just because he was paid $2 or something for the dare. and at that time there was a lot of people in the toilet. can you imagine the scenario?

i shall see the end product of the class notice board tomorrow. and i will definitely keep the present comments to myself.

5 items tomorrow and i'm praying for myself to be in my best condition. especially my right knee.
i hate it. i hate it. i hate it. i hate it. i hate it....

<|5:57 PM|>

Saturday, July 26, 2008

That Personality Test :: Your Results
The latest personality test from ThatSurveySite... now featuring more and better questions than ever!

Emotional (54%)	[...................]	Logical (46%)
Concerned about self (33%)	[.................]	Concerned about others (67%)
Atheist (38%)	[..................]	Religious (62%)
Loner (53%)	[...................]	Dependent (47%)
Laid-back (54%)	[...................]	Driven (46%)
Traditional (55%)	[...................]	Rebel (45%)
Impetuous (62%)	[..................]	Organized (38%)
Engineering mind (46%)	[...................]	Artistic mind (54%)
Cynical (59%)	[..................]	Idealist (41%)
Follower (69%)	[................]	Leader (31%)
Introverted (80%)	[..............]	Extroverted (20%)
Conservative (63%)	[.................]	Liberal (37%)
Logical (51%)	[....................]	Romantic (49%)
Uninterested (78%)	[..............]	Sexual (22%)
Insecure (46%)	[...................]	Confident (54%)
Selective (55%)	[...................]	Tolerant (45%)
Pessimistic (42%)	[..................]	Optimistic (58%)
Principled (37%)	[.................]	Pragmatic (63%)
Tolerant (41%)	[..................]	Opinionated (59%)
Humble (40%)	[..................]	Elitist (60%)

Take the test!

saw it on joseline's blog and decided to try. then by looking at the questions i got so pissed, they asked a lot of sexual things... zzz what more can i say about the results? i dont understand some parts of it anyway.
haha

<|4:28 PM|>

Thursday, July 24, 2008

as promised! pictures of the sky yesterday. some even commented dooms day!

and this is a random picture of the drink my mom asked me to try. treating me as a guinea pig where the results were totally different. hmmm...

today was surprising.

first thing in the morning we received back our physics test paper. i got 24/30 which was ranked 3rd in the class and tied with eileen. haha, the 1st place was tied by yunqing and yongming. expect the unexpected.

mrs cheng gave us a scent pouch. the smell gave me a headache~

small can hang on hp de.

we were suppose to have chem spa and we were getting ready to start when we heard the ~~continuous~~ ringing of the bell. such a pity that was spent 1 whole hour sitting away in the volleyball court. i was really hoping to do the experiments lor.

chinese was nothing much as we started on a new chapter.

after recess we had english. an early celebration of mr lee's birthday as he was going to end his teaching career soon. there was the cake that was shared and of course a singing session to end the celebration. there were some teachers that actually walked by when he was singing. for example mabel yee walked past and asked if we left beautiful memories with him. i dont know who actually said she saw vp walking around. a teacher(forgot name) came to join us in the session.

the happy birthday boy:

bio lesson was omg. mr leong screwed himself up by teaching the wrong information again. nothing to say about this already, maybe teaching is not his cup of tea. there was a lot of confusion and i need to read up on it myself again.

so i have planned my weekend schedule!

coming back to school on saturday for amaths lesson. then i will go out for a lunch, probably eating ban mian. then go study bio at the library lor. find that book i read the last time. no money to buy present leh... oh gosh.

then again, i might not be going to the library on saturday. it is just maybe... if i get too lazy i wont.

sunday i should be doing maths, and more maths. then maybe a bit of chem will do too.

lol, anyone want to join me?

<|4:33 PM|>

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

i have officially reached 500 posts!

i'm freaking tired now for some reason.
carrying that bowling ball around in that 1 ball bag. hurts my fingers as though they are blistered. but they ache as well, so are my shoulder muscles are aching...
my right elbow hurts when i bend it.
then my ankles like aching and pain at the same time.
right knee still hurts...
...

no i should start from the beautiful sky at the start of the day. it was dark!!! and it got darker as we travelled from home to school. NO FRC!
from afar we can see a small patch of the sky that was bright. it was very yellow and it looked like some nuclear explosion happened there. got a few photos of it and i will post it another day.
it rained and it was extremely cold. practically shivering a little. and i must have used a lot of energy to keep warm that i felt extremely hungry. the fact is i have been quite hungry these days because i have not been eating my breakfast properly. not planning to be going down during recess for the rest of the week.

the day was reasonably fine except for the chinese test and amaths quiz. i memorised the trigo identities but at the last minute very luan. should have written them all down first before attempting the questions. chinese was quite ok just that i am still not confident about doing well.

very sleepy le, but still need to study for tomorrow's bio test!!! currently still memorising the part on erythrocytes, leucocytes and thrombocytes. the heart part is @_@ with all the things to memorise. and i'm thinking about what the questions will be like. think, think, think!

i miss the free and easy wednesdays a lot.
i want to sleep!!! T_T tomorrow still need wake up earlier to take bus.
haix...

<|7:59 PM|>

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

haix, i really think i'm a failure.

HOW COULD I FORGET TO BRING HOME MY HW FOR THE SECOND TIME IN THE ROW??? first lesson tomorrow is bio some more. i'll never finish it in time.

this is terrible!!!
oh nvm, i'll find out a way to complete it.

very sleepy today, then i came to school with a very bad headache.
lessons were sian as usual and i was not very excited about anything.
only one thing was that i kept laughing until my stomach was hurting because of the funny things that happened around my seat. liu meng had an ancient street directory! o.o very ancient...

the worst part was the 2.4 run. i dont know why after running a while i felt very irritated. when we first left the school gates, my ankle started hurting a little. i dont know why. then we had people running in the opposite direction and the path we have to run was very limited. the air was quite polluted as i could smell the fogging thing for mosquitoes while running. by second round my heart was very pain liao, and i was desperately forcing myself.
oh no, i'm starting to blame everything when it is suppose to be my fault i didnt run very well.
at least i passed(i hope). i dont know why my hp hanged on me while i was running, then the timer i used stopped. so pissed off that i had to use the clock when i didnt know what time we started off. i tried to sprint at the last part but only 1 second and i could not sprint anymore. -_-"

then again, i think i failed...
what are the possibilities? and i am so going to have to rerun for as many times as possible. running alone is the best still.
suddenly i remembered what ptq said during recess.
first he asked about getting the A for 2.4 when i was already having problems passing in the first place. then the favourite sentence of the pe teachers about girls walking 2 rounds still can pass. i dont really believe it.
i still think my running is like the same speed as my walking.

i dont know if i want to go for bowling tomorrow. i got a bio test on thursday and i have not even started. plainly because i forgot about bringing my textbook home. AND THAT IS WHY I FORGOT MY HOMEWORK.

oh gosh, very disappointed in myself.

<|6:18 PM|>

Monday, July 21, 2008

today is racial harmony day!
for those who didnt see me wearing it, TOO BAD!

came into school not exactly very early. hands filled with things. front gate this morning because i thought it would be faster. school looked normal but heck the fun started at 7am.
so i walked through the concourse, but before i entered i could hear some shoutings from a quite familiar voice. shut up la! just wear it!!!
haha, i tried to guess who was it and i will wait for a reply from the one i guessed. ^^

people kept asking about my outfit and i kept giving inconsistent response.
they range from family heirloom, my mom de, grandmother de, it is priceless...

i got tired of repeating myself, but oh well...
then people were asking if i was peranakan and i said that i was only a quarter peranakan and some thought it was a malay outfit and i didnt know what to say. peranakan is straits-born chinese which makes me chinese and then what? i dont know le.

today was rather chaotic and i was not really paying attention during lesson. time seemed to fly by really quickly. quite distracted by kiat hui though.

sze huey commented that kiat hui is love sick. then what he was doing during assembly was worst. haix, it makes me think back if i was such a person, then i think i was a little...

heels were the challenge of the day. or should it be the sarong?
the sarong that starts coming loose when i keep on standing and sitting. but problem solved after a while. then it came the part about using the toilet when i started thinking about how those who wore such things use the toilet.
terrible experience wearing heels and walking without having to take extremely small steps and it made me look like a penguin. zzz, the distance between my heel and my toes of the other feet is about 2 cm at max.
E.S. said something about getting used to wearing heels because will need to wear to work. i'm ok with heels and the point is, it wont be so difficult to walk next time because i wont wear such a long skirt!

haha, i think i'm quite behind schedule for what i was suppose to do. then again, i cant remember what i was suppose to do...
i need to study!!!

<|6:01 PM|>

Sunday, July 20, 2008

i have no idea how i convinced myself!!!

oh yes how did i do that?
and i actually figured out how to wear the sarong.

accessories like the 3 brooch to be found later.
and i got to wear heels T_T

bad enough trying to walk in the sarong, and now heels.

it makes me wish real hard for it to rain in the morning and we dont have flag raising. more time to change into the sarong kebaya.

I'M JUST PRAYING IT TURNS OUT WELL!

<|11:26 AM|>

Saturday, July 19, 2008

while i was doing homework for the whole afternoon, i was listening to the radio.

then there was one part where they talked about the 10 different kind of ants.
then to know which type you are, you are to add up every digit of the year, month and date you are born. for example,
my date of birth is 18/02/1993
so we add 1+8+2+1+9+9+3=33
then 3+3=6
so i am a number 6 type. and hence the longest description for that type =D

i could not really recall what they said about each type, too fast and i could not understand some parts. it was in chinese after all...

number 1, a wrestling ant. as its name, it will wrestle down all its opponents. then i could not remember the rest.

number 2, a curious ant. curious in all sorts of area. quite a good trait actually, just that being too curious is not always very good.

number 3, playful ant. always playing and fooling around. not a good trait as they often miss the very important and serious parts.

number 4, big headed ant(da tou ma yi). always want justice and fairness. good friend to have, so that there will not be injustice around you.

number 5, old ant. this one is a real thinker. they think and think and think so much... that it gets too much into them la. advice for such people is to relax a bit, dont be too stressed up thinking.

number 6, bald ant(i think i heard this wrongly). when these type of people are young, what their future is like is already quite obvious. they also often keep their feelings to themselves. they are adviced to express their feeling more often, and if it is like a confession, success rates are very high.

number 7, fat ant. they are born leaders, but often lazy. even if they are not born in a leadership position, someone will lead them into it. they are adviced to be less lazy as their future is very good.

number 8, handicapped ant. they are often seen like clowns, doing their best to entertain people. they are a type of friend that it will be very enjoyable to be with. filled with jokes that they never seem to run out of them.

number 9, mochi ant. like mochi, they are very sticky. they stick to people and can get quite annoying. however, they are very lucky people.

number 10, jie pi ant(what is this ar?). they have very strong perfection ideas. and if they are zilian, that could be quite bad.

i think this is quite accurate la. say 80%? but one problem is, how to get a number 1 and a number 10 person? shouldnt they be the same?
haha, just a random post.

<|8:34 PM|>

Friday, July 18, 2008

starting with random things...

is this a cake or a bread?

class photos which some parts of it was quite unexpected.

and the cat i was suppose to draw for the graffiti competition on 8.8.2008.
i dont know why when i draw it, it could never look happy...

the gate at the volleyball court is so dangerous. it was witnessed, 2 friends on seperate days tripped and fell there. both injuring their left knee. its like cursed or something. bad bad, i dont want to fall there either...

today, i got caught for long fingernails. i been cutting them every week, but by friday it is already considered long... i should cut it even shorter each time i suppose, but the parts i can cut is really quite limited. it also depends on how you see it...

ran 2.4 again today and it was horrible. maybe i should really run alone(i will anyway). i walk also barely can catch my breath...i dont know how i run until my injury started to act up again. hope it wont hurt next tuesday as it will be the actual 2.4 run.

didnt get to go for bowling even though they started today. i have not touched my bowling ball, neither am i ready to return to bowling. but now i really dont know if i want to get into next year's team. i cant decide.

today's workshop was quite retarded. playing with the spray cans and making a mess at the back of the dnt block. the pros make it look very easy, but it is actually very hard lor. takes some skills to handle it well, as well as finger/hand power. very tiring after a while. i'm really trying to visualise what it would be like during the competition. i feel so scared... what if we screw up?

then now i have more problems.
monday is going to be very chaotic. new seating arrangement, racial harmony day, blah blah blah.
and now my mom comes to tell me to wear the nonya kebaya top without the sarong, but instead wear some other bottom. how to walk/sit ar? shoes leh? actually everything is not practical...
nevermind, i shall not wear anything special for racial harmony day. i never wore any ethinic costumes before. =\

<|7:41 PM|>

Thursday, July 17, 2008

my brain has been like rojak these days.
then when it comes to the tests, it is a bit like picking out those fine ingredients say sesame seeds from the rojak. they do come out but they may not be full or something.

and today was 3 tests in a row with limited break times in between...

i know at least i will pass the ss content test today. i answered slightly more than 50% of the blanks correctly. the rest is a bit anyhow and jumbled as i could not remember. bad luck to me since i didnt touch my textbook at all.
THE ANSWERS ARE CLEARLY FROM THE TB!!! T_T

chemistry test was relatively ok. except that i sort of forgot if we need to round off to dunno what significant figure or decimal place. cant remember if i put the units correctly =.=
i check the values never check presentation/units of such. managed to finish the paper in time originally stated.
when he said to give 10mins more, i was feeling a bit sian but used it to check and check again. didnt want to leave the place yet.
i dont know why, but i have an uneasy feeling about this test...
but dont kill me if i somehow top the class or something. i started studying for this test since quite a long while ago.

nsw maths test was horrible. by half the time, i was already half asleep... then everything that was simple just started looking more chim. and i start doing rubbish and crap and all the nonsense. guess i dont have any hopes for getting (high)distinction.

then now i have this mounting pile of work that included something that i was suppose to do since last week.
i dont know what i'm actually suppose to do first.

<|6:44 PM|>

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

my computer is starting to love to crash when i exit from games.
it must hate me a lot.

our teachers are rushing to complete the chapters. i realised we are lagging behind many other classes in a lot of subjects.
overdose?
i think it is ok if you read before hand.

>_<
busy studying for the other subjects one after the other, i'm starting to neglect my maths.
chem test and ss content test tomorrow.
next week still got chinese and bio test.
considering the fact that after so long, amaths has not had a single test. and i know many would be complaining again if there is a test.

really got bowling on friday ar?
why must cca resume so fast?
T_T
pft next week start, and i am not ready yet.

i'm one pessimistic person who starts thinking negative without even trying.

i'm more like not ready for anything.

<|6:40 PM|>

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

那句话一直浮现在我脑海里。
也因为那句话，今天我根本不觉得寂寞。
不知不觉地，我为他而祈祷。
他给了我信心让我不再害怕。
我已经很满足了。

anyway, nothing much has happened today. i mean like nothing big.

many small things make one big thing.
at least i think it is ok la.

o lvl chinese listening was ok. i think can score ba, first 5 questions i'm very certain of my answers. the others a bit uncertain. one thing about this listening was that the passages were short and ended quite suddenly, leaving many stunned.
what is over is over, no point dwelling about it.

^^
又不是我没有给你机会。
我提了意见，没有一个人理睬我。
我又能做什么？
到底是谁呢么自私自利呢？
我说了很清楚，但你似乎没有考虑我说的话，也没有考虑我的感受。
需要我每次为这样的问题而这么做吗？
这已经不是第一次了。
第一次我忍了，一句怨言的话也没有说。
第二次我说了算了。
第三次我还是忍了。
算了，我也不想管呢么多了。

<|4:47 PM|>

Monday, July 14, 2008

I OBJECT!

我反对！可是反对无效。

T_T

相仿都不同意坐在一起，为何要这么做？
明知道我不喜欢她，可是他们一直这样。
他们都为自己做了最好的打算，那我为什么没有权力选择？
这一点也不公平。
我宁愿让全部的人让命运帮他们做出安排，也不愿让几个人决定所有的事。
这才是最公平的。

话先放在前头，我可没有一次跟男生同桌。
这算是第一次。
我给人脸色看时，谁会管我呢？

也许这是一个好办法，坏处也是有的。
当然，不可能有100%的人满意这件事。
我还是觉得，几个星期后，人们一定会换回位子，除了那些对座位的安排已经很满意了。

i dont know why i typed this is chinese, but i just did.

<|6:20 PM|>

Sunday, July 13, 2008

have you seen a tv this big??? i heard it is blu-ray dunno what and run on some mac-mini thing. dunno what apple tv and what? THIS COST $16000!!!
then i heard my cousins saying it is only my uncle's project bonus, not the actual pay. $_$
we were playing this band game thing where u have a drummer, a singer and 2 guitarist. i was the bass guitar and it was kind of tiring. strumming the guitar and occasionally my finger slips and i miss the key. haha, i really wonder how much money my uncle spent in total...
oh ya, we also watched the bee movie on this tv with its sound surround system which is really loud. dunno why my cousins say that it is better than watching in the cinema.

yesterday on the way home, we passed by the esplanade that side. there was the national day performance for the primary 5 students. so as we passed by, we managed to watch part of the fireworks. the fireworks come from many direction- near the stage, near the merlion, behind the sitting area. i managed to take a few photos of a not very clear view. i was on the bus which was moving and you do know the time it takes for the photo to be saved on the camera. then there was the reflection of the bus in the photo too -_-"

went home to eat durian! finally, after so long~

that was only a third of the total amount. there was 1 more full box of durian.
haha, 29 seeds in total. not very satisfied though...

<|10:22 AM|>

Friday, July 11, 2008

i was quite irritated with my eyes the whole day.
they were so dry and irritating... even trying to use eyedrops didnt work because most did not get into my eye and...
it just didnt work.
and no, i dont wear contacts.

we practised for next tuesday's listening comprehension and i got full marks for it. haha, i dont know what the sitting arrangement is like lor. i think i need go see again on monday after i checked what my index number is.

during pe we were made to do some physical conditioning thing before running a 2.4. it was quite ok until the part where we heard someone shout "eh yongming your pants dropping!" then laugh until cannot take it.
quite a few girls did not take part in the pe activities due to various reasons. mainly the same few reasons and i think the teacher must have thought they were lying.
2.4 run was much better than before, though it was drizzling a little. managed to finish before 20mins even though it was not my 100% effort. if not for the early stops and loads of talking, i think i could have done better. at last i'm closer to my long-lost gold. but it still depends on my mood!!! ~_~

physics test was really easy and i might have made a few errors. 1 mark might have been lost already. i expect to see a few full marks for this test. and if there are failures, i would be very shock.

sudoku challenge was something that was quite retarded. 30 mins to solve 4. and i only managed to solve 1 and a half of the difficulty 1 questions. the second one was tougher and i had to do a few guessing. maybe guess wrongly or something, i spent about 15mins also never get to solve it. erase and erase but still never completed it.
at least i know i wont have to take part in the next round anyway. i'm lousy at sudoku.

weekends at last, a bit of a hectic schedule to complete my work and study for the tingxie and tests.
need to catch up with some sleep too!

<|4:02 PM|>

Thursday, July 10, 2008

the weather these days are exceptionally unpredictable. at times it is so bright and warm. at times it is so dark and threatening. it could be raining and there could even be a rainbow o.o
haha, that picture of the road is near my primary school and my previous house. if you could see where it is =D

finally i uploaded the photos of the cha yi ke thing!

after school, i went with jyening to have lunch at parkway. cheers to ban mian~

hahaha, i still remember...
this time there was loads of vegetables in it. after eating a lot, i still saw a lot in the bowl. oh man... parkway's one is so much nicer than suntec's one. and i am 100% sure of it. ^^

then i went to the library.
i was just suppose to help my sister return her library books but i ended up finding some reading materials for myself. non-fiction ~_~
of course i looked dumb...
i was looking at a book with a detailed diagram of the heart! and it also had the part of the cardiac cycle and blood(cells). that book was thick and large and what i wanted to find was only a few pages. at least i can finally comprehend the part on transport in humans.
i hope.
sat down at the first floor near the window to read my textbook a bit while enjoying the aircon.
...
wth, the appearance of 2 cchms people gave me a scare!
i was just OMG (stares) but later i picked up my book and somewhat covered my face. woops, i think 1 of them noticed me, or at least that one would know me anyway.
totally unexpected.

^^

<|5:46 PM|>

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

dang
i call that contradiction...

以其人之道，还治其人之身。
我很想这么做但是我不懂得。。。

i dont know what to do, i dont even understand what i am talking about.

if i were to live everyday as though i have an examination coming up...
things seemed much more peaceful and i do get a grip of my academic results.
ok i think i sound mad.

gah, i'm actually studying in front of the computer, highlighting my textbooks and typing out notes. typing is still more efficient than writing ^^

my official busy week next week!
no early dismissals and average dismissal time is 4.30pm.
5pm, 5pm, 5pm, 2pm, 6pm.
rough idea only ^^
thursdays are slack days for myself. LOL

<|6:39 PM|>

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

time and again...

the thought of ripping the paper apart...
it does not happen.

i'm easily pushed around?
maybe
i just give in too easily
maybe

bad habits are hard to change.
the night will pass and everything would be back to normal again.

but it comes back even harder...
when will the problem be solved?

<|8:21 PM|>

today is slack lesson day.
injected with loads of laughters and fun.

charisma was first thing in the morning, i mean what else would you expect to be doing?

then was creative arts where we got quite messy with the paint. i dont know why, but i could not bring myself to disfigure the photograph. so i painted the background first =x
the teacher thought we were having recess and then decided to hold us back for almost 15mins later than normal time. so we were late for english, extremely late.

didnt do much again for english...

i hate it!!! i hate it!!!
if i didnt have to eat my lunch during recess, i would not have gone down. T_T terrible...
JOSELINE!!! WHAT WERE YOU TRYING TO DO!!!
arrrrrgh... i could barely eat my food because it felt very weird having someone stare ____ly at you when you eat. i mean who could? it felt bad, it really did...

cha yi ke!!! 3 rounds of tea which cost us $1 each. haha, i got some photos which i will upload another time. yes remind me another time.

amaths and reading discussion......
ar you get the picture.

immediately after RD, i had to go for the graffiti arts competition meeting thing. for about an hour, i tried to draw a catman(human and cat) which turned out weird. imagine me with the spray can doing such a thing... i must have been out of my mind.

argh. why am i getting the feeling that i am out of place? isolation? maybe i was not trying in the first place.
what is worst? the people around me are just so ____!

<|5:30 PM|>

Monday, July 07, 2008

just the 2 photos i managed to take during the science fair thing last week.

the other day i wanted to eat a lollipop, and when i took it out of the wrapper...

eh wth? how did it break?
it eventually fell off the stick and i was eating a sweet instead of a lollipop.

i feel like i have wasted my weekend. argh
at least i completed most of the work. i mean ya... maybe most la
everything in my room is so messed up that i forgot about some of my homework. out of sight, out of mind. now i really understand what it means lor.

tsk tsk,
get back to work la joan.

<|6:00 PM|>

Sunday, July 06, 2008

the so called long weekend...

i got a lot of work to complete. and i still have to study for my tests which i forgot to bring home my book. how to study? then i realised, without my physics textbook, i also cannot complete my physics workbook.
silly me...

and there is still my creative art assignment i havent started on. where am i suppose to get my photograph photocopied black and white to A3 size. then the image map....
how am i suppose to get the image of what is important to me?
my character?
what i love/hate?
my thoughts on life???

omg la, i cant even answer those questions myself...
HOW TO DO!!!
maybe i need someone to answer some of the questions for me and then i go find the pictures.
i think i need a picture of my friends, but where to get?

haiya, tuesday afternoon stay back for briefing.
wednesday afternoon free but plan to stay in school to do filing. <--- i'll take ages
thursday afternoon got chem test
friday afternoon free at last.

but tomorrow i need to get my ass out of the house to get my photograph printed. damn sian la

<|11:11 AM|>

Friday, July 04, 2008

one eventful friday.

haha...

took height and weight during pe. it just felt odd seeing the arm of the machine lower before the height was recorded. i now see that i am actually considered one of the lighter girls in class. ran a bit and will practise running again on monday. today's weather was perfect for running, air was good and not too warm. dang

i was quite restless during the movie screening. why? my mind was more like out of the LT1 and i could not get a suitable position to sleep.
wait, that is what normally happens when i watch a movie. i don't feel right sitting still for long periods of time.

argh, i forgot how many people i owe presents too le. when i remember who i owe then i shall go buy, along with what i plan to buy. it takes planning for me to go out shopping =x

gah, feels weird chatting random things with someone on my handphone.

there is something i want to say,
but i will wait till the time is right.

<|7:59 PM|>

Thursday, July 03, 2008

haiya, expected.
i screwed another oral. yes, another.
i never failed to screw them if you get my point.

passage was easy. just that i dunno why when i jumbled the words by accident, i could help but to re-read that part. stupid.
conversation was disaster. it was about youth olympics. then i forgot i could make use of the SS stuff we learnt. tourism blah blah.
1) our opinion
2) hopes for it
3) what can we do
there was another one which i forgot. i mean, WHAT CAN WE DO??? omg wth?

yesterday's topic was still easier to me because i can relate to it. today's one? doesnt really affect me.

the worst part during the conversation was. i said "~~~青。。。青。。。what?"
my goldfish memory made me forget it was 青奥会

i feel cursed. almost as though i could never beat my record of not getting >30/40 for oral(english and chinese). my best was 30. and the record of fails i had was... hopeless.

went to attend the science fair thing after my oral. spent the rest of the day there.
when clearing up, i was plucking the mounting tape off the posters and my fingers and nails hurt terribly. got my shoes wet because ee ling accidentally let go of the pail and it spashed around before falling in the lake.
floating away~

sian T_T

<|6:49 PM|>

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

i cant believe it.
everytime during holiday, i will get hooked to gaming.

but immediately after the holiday ends and school term starts, i just automatically "disconnected" from gaming.

disconnected as in not really playing and have no interest to do so.

i dont know why, but i start stoning in front of the computer unless someone talks to me.
pathetic time waster. -_-"

<|6:51 PM|>

today's lessons were very sian. boring lesson-physics-boring lesson-chem-boring lesson-bio.
however, i didnt say the science lessons were boring. neither did i say they were fun.

but but!
BIO SPA WAS FUN!
though the lab reeked of sheep's heart/blood.
jyening and i were quarrelling about who was to do the touching of the heart. though i wanted to do that very badly, i still let jyening do it. T_T

i wanted to poke the heart, and i should have with my bare fingers.
sticking the finger through the heart to find the path for the blood...
extremely cool~

my rubbish drawing of the heart where a few started copying. we did have a problem figuring out the right and the left side of the heart. maybe just me?

the heart that was cut longitudinal. then you can see all the valves and sections of the heart.
yongkhai was freaking out but yijue actually picked it with his bare hands. total difference between... *coughs*

we ended past 2.30pm. rushing around to wash up and go down for lunch.
jyening owes me a favour and she shall repay it tomorrow during lunch ^^

the sky was quite nice. in a sense that half was dark the other half was bright.

tomorrow got the bio fest thing, and i got oral. dang dang dang, i rather not lor. end up can only turn up to help at 3+ to 4pm. i'm doing the leeches part or something, maybe another thing.
looks totally cool but i wonder if anyone would be freaked out.

my head has been hurting so much today. it must be just the weather.
haha

<|5:13 PM|>

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

paparazzi alert!!!

omg, suddenly i feel like covering my ears everytime they talk about it.
i'm feeling a bit paiseh liao la.

i'm going to go mad~

because of sunday, i suddenly had the urge to go out with the long forgotten BrokenExile people. especially ed and isaac... when i passed by the places we spent time at on 23/6/07, i told someone about what happened at the same spot that day. but i still remember the lunch. even exactly what we ordered and why we went there. my heart felt at peace, i dont know why.

i seem to remember all the enjoyable times i have spent out with friends. they are worth a part of my memory.

i just remembered about yesterday, during interaction...
we were talking about books we read. and when i was asked, i had nothing to say.
firstly, i dont really read.
secondly, i read more non-fiction than fiction and more chinese than english.
thirdly, and sadly, i dont enjoy it.

forget it. if assuming those who do not read will not do as well as those who read in terms of grades...
then what if i start reading?
it only works for language maybe? i mean for reading english fiction...

forget it. someone should convince me into reading.
it will be really, really hard.
i cant remember how many times i could not even get pass the first chapter in many different books. i will also be unable to remember what i read too, mainly in bits and pieces.
i got some problem la.

bowling phototaking was another funny one. i dont know why they took group and individual divisions photos. hey hey! i got to stand on the chair! but we nearly fell off at the informal part. we also used our hands to form the X sign to represent strike.
c div starting competition next week! it just feels weird. all those juniors that i do not know? then the few that i know do not talk to me anymore.

i still feel very isolated from the others.

<|8:23 PM|>